Guest Post: My BDSM is a KVM?!

I got some long awaited play time with a partner of mine recently. Play time I had been desperately looking forward to and needing with a partner that places me firmly in the capital D area of play. Something I was totally game for in the moments leading up to play time when suddenly  I became incapable of putting that hat on. All I wanted was sweaty messy awkwardness bathed in passion and an electric connection. Well hell… that didn’t work out at all. As a matter of fact it created all sorts of awkward all up in my business. Which lead me to a simple question of Windows ME complexity and fail… “WTF is wrong with me?!?!” This isn’t the first time my brain has done this, in any direction.


While pondering this question, I realized that my BDSM is like a damned KVM stuck on scan, and I can’t turn it off! I have a B, D, S, M, exhibitionist, voyeur, and a vanilla set top box all hooked into my sexual KVM and I can’t get it out of scan mode. Sure I can briefly select the operating system I want but it will, inevitably, scan to the next OS right as I’m about to launch my programs and get down to some serious computing.


Let me tell you, it sucks. It sucks like Windows 8. It sucks like the end of the Dreamcast. It sucks like waking up in the morning with the distinct feeling of 0’s on your 1’s, or visa versa, and realizing it’s your own hand.


Where the hell is the owners manual for this thing?!?! Seriously, I’m asking!


Geek on.